Taking the Stress out of the Holidays (and learning to let go)

Every year I have the best of intentions to make this Christmas season last. To squeeze every drop of happiness, joy and merriment out of the planning, baking, shopping, decorating, family advent activities and parties.  And every year, life tries to muck up my plans.

We get so busy this time of year it’s rather silly.  Not only do we busy ourselves with holiday plans, but it seems to peek for work, kids activities and needs and family commitments.

However, I try very hard to hold onto my plan and not get stressed.  I can’t tell you how many minutes (hours?) I spend sitting in the semi-dark with a hot drink and staring at the lights on the Christmas tree.  It’s something I’ve done since I was a teenager, taking a few minutes to just stop.  And I find that works well.

The one thing with having kids at this time of year is that they help keep the spirit going. We have our advent activities, Gingy the Elf has returned, they want to watch Christmas movies and do holiday crafts.  So even on days that I feel time is slipping out of my fingers, they ground me and remind me of the ‘fun’ stuff I should be doing.  I appreciate that.

When Andy was sick, and in the thick of chemo during the weeks leading up to Christmas, I remember almost forcing myself to do everything normal for the sake of the kids.  We decorated, I baked, they went to parties and we did crafts.   I was hyper conscious that all of us (including Andy) needed that time as a distraction and as a goal.

This year, it’s all about the kitchen renos, how busy both Andy and I have been with work and the kids, and so it’s easy to see these weeks slipping through my fingers once again.

However, I’m learning to let go.  To trade the pressure and the stress for the fun.  The kids and our activities come first, and everything else will get fudged somewhere in between.   I have a full box of decorations unpacked and not put up.  With the main floor still not fully complete, I can’t put everything out anyway.  Instead of stressing about it, I’m letting that box stay unpacked this year. I have my fresh wreath on the door, my first real Christmas tree and a few other signs of Christmas and that’s all I need.

I can’t bake just yet (next week!) until the kitchen is done. Usually, in  truth, I would have been on my third round of baking by now.  Some I gift, some we would use at upcoming gatherings, and some for Christmas day/the week after.  Since I won’t be able to do that, I’ve instead enlisted the help of local bakers. I figure I’m supporting a local business, plus losing some of the stress of getting it all done.

When we host our annual Wine and Cheese event with 14 people next Saturday, instead of baking everything from scratch, I’m scoring some simple appetizers from Sobeys and will have a few yummy treats on hand.

My shopping was made easy this year because I started in early October. With both of my sister’s having November babies, they wanted to start early themselves so it worked out well.  I have a few things to finish, but that’s it.  Much less stress.

The one thing that I need to reclaim though is time.  With school, colds, work, plans, errands etc. time seems to run away on me.  We’ve been doing family holiday movie nights where we snuggle up and watch our favourites.  We are making extra time for games and activities and crafts together.  We are trying hard.

The fact is, Christmas is less than two weeks away.  All of the other stuff won’t matter, but our time together as a family will.  That’s where my focus will be.  The rest, I’m letting go of.

How about you? Are you feeling the pressure or enjoying the ride?